suicide.

well.
i feel fucking fucked up now.
and everything is bottomed up inside me.
i have nowhere else to turn to.
the only place i can say everything out is on my fb .
and twitter.
but this leads to everyone seeing them.
sooo i've come to my blog.
where not many cares.
well nobody cares in the first place.

and i would like to say.
i aint tryin to get any fucking attention.
i aint tryin to get any sympathy from anyone.
i just wanna fucking say wad i feel.
cause this life just seriously fucking sucks.

i dunno where to begin.
but basically. it all starts from family.
this family sucks.
i dun have a proper family.
i always see friends with sucha nice family.
where the parents bother to care.
the parents gives allowance.
pay for lessons.
they cook or just put food on the table.
so you survive.

but wad do i get in this family?
no father.
actually is a father who fucking laze arnd doing nth.
and fooling with women.
and now he is out of my life.
but how i wish.
i always wish.
i had a dad.
a dad who cares.
a dad who loves.

and wad abt my mum?
she changed totally ever since my fucking dad gone.
its like a recoil.
she got rid of a fucking man.
and here comes a fucking woman.
she dun even cares if we have food to eat.
she borrows money and dun fucking return.
and in due time she just dun care anymore.
wtf.
seriously. wtf.

thisishowFUCKEDUPthisfamilyis.

i see everyone.
they dun even have to worry.
when they get home.
they have food.
they have the parents love they need.

me?
i have got nth.
no dad.
and a mum who dun cares abt out livelihood.

how i wish.

='(

i'm damn emotional noww. sheesh.
i'm thinking alot.
theres also more prob in my life.
but..

~~eugeneN~~